First of all, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!
I pray 2017 is tons better than 2016 was. Even if last year was amazing for you, *although that puts you in the minority* there’s always room for more blessings, abi?

So the title of this post is a tad misleading because I honestly didn’t just come to this realisation….it’s something most people that are close to me know but I’m saying it out loud and publicly for the first time.

When you are a single woman of a certain age *read old spinster* society automatically assumes that you want certain things.. Well, guess what? Not all of us old spinster want them.

I’m getting ahead of myself, watch the video.
Thank you sooooooo much for always supporting your girl. God bless y’all XOXO

SUBSCRIBE TO THE YOUTUBE CHANNEL!! I really enjoy making videos so encourage me na!!

These 2 are an absolute riot and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love them dearly and fiercely and I KNOW that the feeling is mutual.

That’s a great feeling, trust me.

That in no way negates the fact that they are both the shadiest and most bitchy people you could ever meet and I looooove it!!

We talked about a LOT!! From feminism to great wine to “ashy niggers”

You know what, I’ll just stop writing here…enjoy!!!

DISCLAIMER

A lot of alcohol was consumed in the making of these videos and some shade was thrown here and there but hey, that’s life.

See ehhhhhn, Q is one of my favorite people because she’s undeniably mad and really doesn’t need any one to tell her…
It’s funny that I have probably one of my most personal “in bed with….” with the craziest person I know.
Go figure..
We talked about religion, mental health and relationships *with a bit of twerking in between *
We sha had fun and I hope y’all enjoy watching us.

MMMMWWWWWAAAHHHH

PS

There’s a poll underneath the video. 

It’s totally anonymous so please take it.

If there’s anything you feel I might be able to help you with concerning any of the topics we discussed, my contact details are at the top right hand corner. 

Here’s a poll: 

I love my friends…
I have such a quirky but fun bunch of people in my life who just give me joy. I thank God for them all the time.
I had fun filming this with Ebele especially as she can be very shy so I’m super grateful hon.. Xoxo

*I have to add a disclaimer here.. We spoke a LOT of igbo so brace yourselves*

Asides from our mucking around, we did get to talking about self esteem and believing in yourself. I hope someone gets something out of this…

Either way, enjoy!!!

MMMMMWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

Yes, there’s two Uches so I had to specify which one.
I looooove Uche. We became friends by accident and I’m super grateful for life’s little accidents because she’s truly been a blessing in my life. She gets me. She supports me *this blog exists because of her*. She spoils me *I’m sure y’all have seen the videos *.
She understands my battle with depression and is ALWAYS there to remind me how far I’ve come.
I love her…
As usual *because my friends are a riot*, there’s no real message in this video…just two friends having a laugh and hopefully entertaining you.

Ps
I got her AND the other Uche together for a couple of videos!!! Y’all definitely need to look out for that.
They are a hot mess!!! Jesu!!

Yes, I do. Very much sef.
I’m also a card-carrying feminist. I don’t know why some people think the two can’t co-exist.
“Haba but you cook for your men, call your significant other Oga’m, don’t believe in “going Dutch” and  believe in polygamy “
How can you be a feminist?

Easily…

Whether we like it or not, gender roles exist. Rightly or wrongly…they do.
You have to undo over a million years of evolution to change that.

So let’s try to change what we can, shall we?
I live with my brother for various reasons, the first being that I love him dearly and he’s a fantastic housemate to have *the boy washes dishes biko..have you seen my nails?*
The next and if I’m honest probably the most strategic is that he’s a man.

Men are sooooooo useful. Why on earth would you choose not to use them if you can?? That’s just dumb!! They open difficult cans, change light bulbs, iron and generally do things that I really don’t want to bother my pretty little head with…
He sorts out my car issues so I don’t have to. He deals with the generator/nepa etc…Yes, some would say “why won’t you learn and be independent of him?”
Errrrrrrrm, because I don’t want to.
Call police…

Feminism is about choice to me. I want women to simply have the choice and opportunity to be the president if they want to *and are qualified for the job* and also not be judged if they decide they rather be a homemaker.
DO NOT BOX US IN!!!

We are flexible so allow us flex, oginidi??
Not every woman *or person for that matter* is cut out for the white-collar or high-flying business life. I know a couple of men that are so dedicated to their children and homes that I KNOW for a fact that if they lived in a different society, they would gladly become house husbands.

No they aren’t gay.

I also know women that are so far from maternal  that you have to wonder why they had children that they are clearly not interested in.

I want little girls that show an interest in engineering to be encouraged and I also want the ones who rather be in food and nutrition class not to be mocked. Or even the girl who chooses to be the pampered 3rd wife of a Kano billionaire. We aren’t sheep, we are thinking beings that make decisions that work for US.

I enjoy cooking for my people *when I get off my lazy butt* it gives me joy to see my labour of love being enjoyed by the people I love. I like to keep a tidy home *when Achike will allow it..* I’ll call my significant other “Oga’m” because I’m a local girl who does local love. I WILL NOT go Dutch on a date YOU invited me to. No Sir!!!! I believe in polygamy because it’s a system that when it’s done right *read lots of money* it works perfectly fine for all parties involved especially if they are wired a certain way. I might need to write a whole post dedicated to that particular topic but let’s finish with this one first, okay?

Why is all this a problem??

I also want our government to be a minimum of 50% female. Why? Because we have enough qualified women to fill that quota so why the hell not?

Feminism to me is about fighting for the girl child to have choices and opportunities that her male counterparts do. It sounds simplistic but that to me is the core of it all.

*Drops mic*

So your girl was invited to Spinlet to discuss some possible collaborations in the very near future and I'm super excited about it.    





  

Hello beautiful people!!!! 

I know I havent posted in a while, make una no vex for you girl. 

Like joke, like joke we are in July sha.....time sure does fly.

May the good Lord continue to bless and guide us throughout the rest of the year.

Enjoy the videos and if you want to share any experiences with me... here or privately via email, don't hold back biko.
*You will note that i dont edit my videos, i think it detracts from the authenticity*

I'm sorry but the video stopped and I had to make a part 2.

Have a wonderful day/week/month
Remain blessed and fabulous

MWWWAAAAAHHHHHHHH

No, it's not the one you think it is.

I wouldn't wear white on my big day even if you paid me to.... *ok, it depends on how much you are offering and if it's bespoke Versace*

My close friends and family will recognise this story. About a year ago, my brother Achike was doing some laundry and asked if i had any whites to add to the load of washing. I paused and realised that i didn't own one single white item of clothing.

I was simply too fat to get away with white so why bother buying it. See ehhhhn, I've always dressed the body i had pretty damn well. I've had some fashion disasters *who hasn't* but all in all, i like to think i was quite the stylish fat chick.  In that spirit of knowing what suited me and what didn't, i knew better than to try myself with white.

So I decided that it would be my goal to wear a white slinky dress for my 40th birthday.

That clearly didn't happen considering I wore this....

I was a lazy cow *as y'all know* and started dress shopping pretty late but in my defence, i had some plans that didn't fall through so that kinda annoyed me and made me slack.  When i did decide to start dress shopping, all the white dresses i saw where either too bridal, didn't look right or was just too damn expensive *there's life after the party biko*  Oyiboka was going mad with worry.  i had dreamt of how i was going to show off this new banging body of mine in a white HOT dress!!!!

Part of my growth process as a human being has been learning how to not spazz out when things don't go my way and fall into a funk. I have been pretty open about my bouts of depression and random moments of self loathing 

The old me was so tightly wound up and would have thrown a fit and cancelled all plans, withdraw into my bedroom or go down to Onitsha to be babied by Funmi *that's my mothers name* Call me childish but that was my truth. Emphasis on "was". Now I stop and remind myself of how incredibly blessed I am.

Anyway, to cut a long story short i chose not to sulk or throw a tantrum and started looking for other options.

I got the amazing Tadashi Shoji dress i wore 24hrs before my birthday and guess what, although I needed to adjust it a little, it was perfect for me and the occasion.

Fast forward a couple of weeks later...May 4th to be exact.

It was my Tiv Princess's birthday *Seember or Gorgeousbskin to y'all*

That wonderful human being  proceeded to shower me with presents on HER birthday.

One of them was this dress.

She is one of the people who knew the "white dress plan"

It's taken me over a month to find the right occasion to wear it to, but on Sunday, I did.

My niece Afulenu was taking her first communion and Madre was here for it.

So I finally got my white HOT dress. It fit like a dream and more importantly, my niece loved it. She had already warned me to wear a nice dress because all her friends would be there. *yes, I'm raising divas in my yard*

The moral of the story is that we can wish and plan all we like but God decides when he wants to do when he's good and ready. In hindsight, that white dress would have screamed DESPERATION!!!!

I am working on treating my single pringle status the same way. As much I'd love to be with someone and fall madly and crazily in love, I'm just going to let God do his thing.

Have a wonderful day folks, remain blessed and fabulous...

MMWAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH